For the next month, True Stories Well Told is featuring essays by writers in my “Start Writing Your Life Story” workshop at the Art Lit Lab in Madison in Fall 2023. My next workshop there starts in April 2024.

By Carrie Callahan

I was sitting at my desk the Monday after hosting a successful Red and Green Chili themed Christmas Party the afternoon before. I was feeling good. 2017 had been a good year and it was ending on a great note!

In the summer of 2015, I sold my big house on Larkin Street and half of my belongings. I moved into a two-bedroom condo and treated myself to a bucket list trip to Bali with a group of spiritual travelers. I wanted to be at peace with myself and my life.

I was coming home after three weeks to start fresh in a new house. Although one of my heart’s desires was to have a loving companion and partner, it was clear that it was time to step away from the dating scene for awhile. I made a clean and permanent break from an “on again, off again” relationship that was going nowhere and unsubscribed from all online dating sites. I was going to give myself until January 2018 to decide if I had the courage to give online dating one more try – or if I was going to be at peace being single for the rest of my life.

In the winter of 2017 I started ballroom dancing class – again. It was fun and something I looked forward to each week, Colin, one of the guys in the group classes, was a really good dancer. Why he was at these beginner classes was a mystery to me but dancing with somebody who knew what they were doing was great and it kept me coming back. In the fall, the studio announced that it was closing. I so enjoyed dancing with Colin and I didn’t want that to end so I used this as an opportunity to exchange phone numbers. There was conversation about attending a dance a few weeks later. I was hoping Colin would be there – and he was. We danced often that afternoon to Ladies Must Swing. I even picked up a vibe that he might be interested in finding ways to dance together in the future. What fun! A dance partner!

So it seemed that things had shifted for Colin and he was interested in more than just a dance partner. By the end of November Colin had asked me out – to a concert. Oh dear! I suggested maybe a coffee date would be be a better idea – to see if we even liked each other off the dance floor. We had a lovely evening talking and getting to know each other. It’s almost January right?! It wouldn’t hurt to entertain the idea of dating – would it?!

At that point I’d been single for 19 years. I had a good life. It wasn’t perfect but it was comfortable. Over the years I’d dated plenty and had a few relationships too. I wasn’t going to open my heart to just anyone but I sure liked the idea of getting to know Colin better and having a dance partner was great! We quickly set up what turned out to be a month of dates starting with his birthday on December 9, and ending with my birthday on December 29th. My plan was to put him in as many different experiences as I could, to assess…..

One of those “experiences” was my Green and Red Chili Christmas Party. Time for him to meet my friends! I had this idea that he’d just pop in for a polite hello but to my surprise he arrived a few minutes early, helped with the final set-up, respected my role as hostess, and then stayed and helped me clean up – even doing dishes! What?! Oh, and I forget to mention our first kiss in front of the fireplace. It was lovely.

So now here I am sitting at my desk on this freezing December morning. I look out and see the Felly’s truck pull into the guest parking and think, “Oh, isn’t that great! Somebody is getting flowers for Christmas.” I always loved it when the florist would arrive each Christmas with a huge poinsettia for my mom. Well, the next thing I know the Felly’s guy is walking towards my door. WOW! Who in the world would be sending me flowers? I accepted this mystery bouquet with more than a bit of excitement. As I took off the wrapping what appeared before me was the largest and most beautiful Christmas bouquet I’ve ever received with a card saying “Thinking of You – Colin.”

Holy smokes……I wasn’t really sure Colin was my type – but then I thought, “Here I am divorced and still single after 19 years. Maybe I need to reconsider my type!” Colin had made a grand gesture and my laissez-faire attitude needed to be reassessed. We spent Christmas Eve together and then my birthday. The tone of our conversations changed and we explored deeply what we hoped for the future.

On January 6th, I surrendered my heart. A year later we were married in Savanah, Georgia in a beautiful private ceremony and I haven’t looked back. We have a beautiful home and a beautiful life and we continue to dance – moving together, leading and following, using the skills we learned on the dance floor to dance through the great life we continue to create each day. And each December 18 since, the Felly’s truck pulls up with a huge bouquet marking the anniversary of our first kiss. So much for thinking I knew my “type”!

© 2024 Carrie Callahan

Carrie Callahan is a creative life-long learner. When she’s not writing, she’s reading, working in the garden, whipping something up in the kitchen for her hubby or making a mess in her studio.